Lily's Story

Monday, February 28, 2011

Year of the Rabbit

This was written at the beginning of February...

On February 3rd, the Chinese rang in a new year - the Year of the Rabbit. I've never paid much attention to the Chinese new year or the Chinese zodiac, other than the passing news story or perusing the place mats at Chinese restaurants. But this year - the Year of the Rabbit - caught my eye for several reasons.

While I was pregnant with Lily, I saw a little bunny outside my office practically every day. When I would leave work, the bunny would scurry off the porch. Our building is a converted 19th Century house. As I walked down the steps I would see the bunny scramble to safety under or near my car. He would dash out from my car just as I got closer and disappear behind the neighboring apartment building. The first time I saw him, he scared me just as much as I scared him. But soon after I would get excited to see him.  In my "everything is perfect" pregnancy haze, the bunny was another thing to look forward to. A sign of a happy spring.

Our spring wasn't happy. We lost Lily on May 9th. After I returned to work after her death, I never saw the bunny again. It's possible my haze of grief shielded me from seeing him. But I really don't recall seeing him at all over the summer.

He resurfaced in the winter. One day in December, as I was leaving work, a much older, bigger rabbit hopped calmly away as I opened the door and stepped onto the porch. He hopped over to the snowbank piled high in front of my car. I fully expected him to scurry away when I opened and shut the car door, and certainly when I started the engine, but he didn't. He watched as I pulled out and when I looked back at him, he had propped himself up on his hind legs and watched me as I disappeared out of the driveway.

About three days later, being the wonderfully domestic wife I am, I ordered Chinese take-out for our dinner. It is typical for our favorite Chinese restaurant to include a new calendar with every order in December. Usually though we throw it out because it includes pictures of scantily clad Asian women. To our surprise the 2011 calendar was one designed for the Year of the Rabbit. Several animated bunnies comprise the artwork for this year's calendar.

Surely, these were good signs! First, the office bunny re-appears.  Second, 2011 is the Year of the Rabbit. Rabbits are the sign of fertility. They symbolize spring and rebirth. They seem to be a sign of hope. If 2011 was dubbed Year of the Rabbit, then it must mean good things for me.

Here's hoping....

No comments:

Post a Comment